Learning to drive. Or not.

So this is a rant. Sorry.

I hate driving. I hate it so much. I think that it is quite possibly the number one thing that I hate the most on this Earth.

So obviously it's the one thing that my entire family is convinced that I need to learn how to do, and if I don't then "your life is ruined and you'll never go far".

Yay life.

I tried. Oh God help me I tried. But at even the thought of getting behind the wheel of a car I get all tense and I feel like I'm going to throw up. I did ten hours (ten tortuously long hours) of driving lessons and then I had a breakdown. In a restaurant. Surrounded by my family. Because they were asking me about it.

I just broke down completely and my mother had to help me leave the restaurant. And now my family likes to tease me, and prod me, and try to convince me that I should try again. "It's not that bad" they say. "I'm sure you're better at it then you think you are" they tell me.

Maybe I am. But I don't want to learn. And I won't. I am never getting behind the wheel of a car again, no way in hell. Because it's torture, and when I'm behind that wheel of death I can't relax and all I can think about is what if I kill someone, what if I kill myself, what if I have an accident and hurt myself or someone else. What if, what if, what if.

It's not worth the nightmare, the lack of sleep, and the illness. I'll walk, or take public transport, thank you very much.

Some random dude my mother and I met at one of her friends house was really snobby to me about that. He told my mother that she should stop picking me up at the train station when I come home to visit, and never bring me anywhere so that I could "learn the importance of knowing how to drive". I said fine. No problem. I've walked from the station to home before. And when I go from my dads to my mums or vice versa I always walk.

Mock me, and laugh at me if you want. I'll not drive.

Besides my mum was on my side there. My family can pick and prod all they like, but outsiders can stay out. Call it solidarity if you will.